J'ADORE JOEY

J'ADORE MAIS JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-11-12T03:28:00.003-05:00

We know you hate us for not J'Adoring you anymore. It sucks. We know. We've been soooo out of our minds with work. We'd tell you about all the tales, but we're bound contractually to all the glamour because that's just how we do. But we're coming to you at 3:30am as we wind down from a crazy day's work to share with you a little symphony. Sit back, relax and J'Adore. Know that we're always with you. xoxo

J'ADORE THE GAYEST VIDEO EVER MADE!

2009-09-27T15:25:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE A LITTLE PARTY!

2009-09-16T11:59:00.003-04:00

We've been out of minds this summer with work and all. And most recently, we produced this little party. Now do you understand why we've been gone so long? We still J'Adore you major!

J'ADORE NEVER GONNA GIVE YOUR TEEN SPIRIT UP!

2009-07-20T01:37:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE GHOSTS!

2009-07-07T09:37:00.002-04:00

We're not THAT big on ghostbusting. We like to bust other things, if you know what we mean. But this video from inside Michael Jackson's house via CNN is pretty spooky! What the hell is that???

J'ADORE MICHAEL JACKSON'S WILL!

2009-07-01T15:34:00.001-04:00

We loved Michael Jackson LONG time. A little known fact for all of you J'Adorables....P.Y.T. was actually written for us! It was so sweet, and we'll miss him. See above his last will and testament! He totally left us all his glittery gloves! J'Adore!!!

J'ADORE QUICK UPDATES!

2009-06-30T08:28:00.002-04:00

J'Adorables!!! We are SO sorry to have been away for so long. We got a new and exciting full time job, and then three weeks into it, we took off and spent a week DEEP in the Costa Rican jungles! What a crazy month it has been! We promise we'll be back soon, but until then, please keep J'Adoring amongst yourselves. xoxo

J'ADORE AT HOME WITH COCO CHANEL!

2009-06-15T08:00:00.001-04:00

J'ADORE LITERAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART!

2009-06-01T01:23:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE MISBEHAVING!

2009-05-26T19:57:00.005-04:00

But on another note, most well-behaved and misbehaved bitches living in a run down part of the Appalachian Mountain ridge seldom wear REAL CHANEL belts to match their denim skorts. (And that's NOT a typo...a skort is a skirt short combo only worn on the Appalachian Mountain ridge.....and some parts of Queens.)

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-05-26T14:54:00.002-04:00

Read all about the CA Prop 8 injustice here via DocStoc.
California Supreme Court ruling on Proposition 8 -

J'ADORE LEARNING TO CRAWL?

2009-05-20T00:04:00.001-04:00

J'ADORE COMMON CEMENT!

2009-05-19T13:00:00.001-04:00

J'ADORE WTF?

2009-05-17T12:42:00.002-04:00

We came across this article in Woman's Day about over the top dog houses, and we're a bit offended. When a dog's house is bigger than your own, a J'Adorable has got to get pissed off!

And yes, Bitches, we read Woman's Day for the recipes. Don't try to play like you don't!

J'ADORE COCO PARLANT DE LA MODE!

2009-05-17T12:19:00.001-04:00

J'ADORE UBER-TECHNOLOGY!

2009-05-15T11:32:00.005-04:00

We are SOOOO high tech right now with this live Twitter feed. Every time you visit J'Adore the latest tweets from NotCot, MocoLoco, The Standard NY, Stan D'Arde and others will appear in the above graphic. If you refresh the page, you'll get a new feed.

Don't hate us because we're Steve Jobs incarnate.

J'ADORE MATTHEW WILLIAMSON FOR H&M!

2009-05-11T12:41:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE LINDA'S BIRTHDAY!

2009-05-10T10:16:00.004-04:00

Today should be an international holiday. Banks should be closed. City workers should be given the day off. All national infrastructures should all come to a screeching halt.

For on this day, forty-four years ago, the greatest supermodel of all time, Ms. Linda Evangelista, was brought into this glorious world. Angels cried. Cherubs sang. The sun shone brighter than it had ever shone before.

Everyone needs to run to their nearest CHANEL boutique and pay homage......NOW!

J'ADORE EASTER TRANNY DESTRUCTION!

2009-05-04T21:15:00.005-04:00

Okay, so we're not ACTUALLY at the Met's Costume Institute Gala. We kindly declined Marc Jacob's invite to sit at his table ce soir when we heard Linda Evangelista was not going to be there, but we digress...

Our J'Adorable insiders just sent us this photo of Madonna as she was arriving to the ball tonight. What in the name of Easter Tranny HELL is she wearing??? We know it's Vuitton and all. Don't think we're THAT stupid, but what the hell is on her head???

Honestly, we are over Madonna in a MAJOR way. The bitch peaked for us with her Like A Prayer album, but again, we fucking digress because we have to in order to maintain our sanity. UGH. Somebody shoot her already. Even her publicist, Liz Rosenberg, is staring at those damn bunny ears thinking WTF???

Done. J'Adore.

J'ADORE GROCERY SHOPPING!

2009-05-04T11:33:00.005-04:00

A girl was shopping at the local supermarket where she selected:

- half-gallon of 2% milk

- carton of eggs

- quart of orange juice

- head of lettuce

- 2-lb. can of coffee

- 1-lb. package of bacon

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."

She was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said: "Well, you know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?"

The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

Thanks to Kimry Blackwelder for sending in this funny.

J'ADORE DOIN' IT DOGGY STYLE!

2009-05-04T08:25:00.004-04:00

Honestly. We are dying over this video. Our favorite part is that this bitch drops to the floor when the dog starts assaulting her, and she gets on her hands and knees giving the dog full access to his every need. Eastern European women are kink-AY! At any age! J'Adore!

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-05-03T23:54:00.002-04:00

We totally didn't go to church today (or for the last 19 years for that matter), and we got an email from Jesus Christ today with the above pic attached. The Fear of God is the new Black, we guess.

J'ADORE iSNORTING

2009-05-01T16:31:00.001-04:00

J'ADORE CUPCAKE EXPERIENCE!

2009-04-30T15:58:00.005-04:00

Last night, we were invited to dinner at the city residence of our favorite J'Adorables Chris Tennant and Zoe Turnbull. We dined on puff pastry with ricotta and asparagus baked right into it alongside lemon dover sole and lightly chilled green beans tossed in vintage olive oil and lemon zest. An inspired meal to say the least.

Seated next to us at the table were Peter Holm and Eva Mag of Swedish Indie rock group Cupcake Experience. When we asked Eva who the icing on the cupcake was, she said "Peter of course. I'm more like cake!" We were inclined to agree.

Their music is eerily gorgeous, beautifully dark and solemnly sullen. Signals of Love is the theme, but we're calling it Signals of J'Adoration. Check out the album here.

J'ADORE NOT DOING THIS!

2009-04-30T12:48:00.003-04:00

We just received this cautionary swine flu picture from Mary Pat Thibodeau, our most favorite little photo editor over at In Touch Magazine, and we can't stop laughing! It arrived with simple instructions telling us "DON'T DO THIS!" Don't worry, MPT, we won't.

J'ADORE NOW NUMBERS!

2009-04-28T17:49:00.000-04:00

J'ADORE SWINE FLU!

2009-04-27T20:31:00.002-04:00

We think we just found the origin of swine flu. J'Adore! Someone give us the Nobel Peace Prize!

J'ADORE SHOWING YOU HOW IT'S DONE!

2009-04-27T15:46:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE WET CELERY JOKES!

2009-04-27T14:56:00.002-04:00

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from.

So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, "Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery??"

She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher".

J'ADORE FLASH DANCING!

2009-04-27T12:59:00.005-04:00

J'ADORE LETTING THE CABLES SLEEP!

2009-04-27T11:56:00.000-04:00

J'ADORE SLOW MOTION SNEEZING!

2009-04-24T14:54:00.003-04:00

Sneezing In Ultra Slow Motion - Watch more Funny Videos

J'ADORE CAMEROON!

2009-04-23T08:16:00.006-04:00

If this is what the First Lady of Cameroon really looks like, we want to relocate ASAP! J'ADORE! Here is Chantal Biya and Paris Hilton at the African First Ladies' Health Summit Gala in Beverly Hills the other day. Click here for more pictures of this African stunner.

J'ADORE FARTKONTROL!

2009-04-23T08:13:00.001-04:00

We're J'Adoring this picture provided us by Bryan Boy. We can't tell you where it was taken, but all we know is that we're glad we're not in charge of controlling.

J'ADORE INTERACTIVE MUSEUMS!

2009-04-21T13:25:00.003-04:00

We are J'Adoring the New Museum's Interactive site. All you have to do is click on the map in any place in the world, and you're able to see the front page of the local newspapers there. Totally uncensored and raw. J'Adore journalistic integrity....or a lack thereof.

J'ADORE LADY DOUGLAS!

2009-04-18T15:22:00.005-04:00

We're gonna keep this one simple because, honestly, this blog has given more exposure to Douglas Friedman than even WE are comfortable with, but when a friend has something we need to support, we always do.

This coming Thursday, Lady Douglas is celebrating his latest exhibition entitled LADY at The Ruffian Gallery owned by fashion designers Brian Wolk and Claude Morais. Click on the invite above for all details, and you have to RSVP to attend or else you risk getting brutally shunned at the door.

There better be a photo of us in the show, or we're gonna cause a scene that would make any real Lady mad with jealousy!

J'ADORE STAN D'WITTER!

2009-04-16T17:37:00.007-04:00

You know how much we love Stan D'Arde, the drunken chicaholic mascot of the Standard Hotels. (For those of you who REALLY know, you need to keep your big mouths shut, or we'll cut you!)

Well we have news for you. Monsieur D'Arde has gone and had one too many dirty martinis because the bitch went out and got himself a Twitter profile. Yes. You heard us correctly. Stanley is now feeding the twittersphere with the fabulously sloshy take on his world as he (and only he) knows it.

Follow Stan if you dare.

J'ADORE WOODIES!

2009-04-15T15:32:00.005-04:00

We love when celebrity goes wrong, and we love it even more when it goes HORRIBLY wrong. Apparently, American Apparel used the likeness of Woody Allen in one of their ads and the bitch is suing to the tune of $10 million! The ad in question is one where Woody is dressed up like a rabbi. The above is a parody made by someone, but we think it's funnier. Read the full story here.

Below are the official court papers via DocStoc.com's GENIUS new document embedding technology. Who knew you could make that happen???

Woody Allen Lawsuit Against American Apparel

J'ADORE LINDA EGGVANGELISTA!

2009-04-13T00:51:00.002-04:00

The Lord is J'Adored! He is J'Adored indeed! We had a crazy fun Easter weekend, Bitches, and we're gonna skip all the minor happenings and go straight to the eggstatic Easter basket we made.

We spent the weekend with our favorite J'Adorables Zoe Turnbull, Chris Tennant, Lucy McIntyre and Krista Freibaum decoupaging some major Easter eggs. Martha Stewart sent her "boys" over to get us to stop our hostile takeover of her empire, but we decoupaged their sorry asses up and sent them running back to her farm in Connecticut.

We want you to pay special attention to Linda Eggvangelista cuz she's got a rabbit fur mohawk. You'll also notice the modern furniture egg Zoe made. Lucy busted out a Mr. President egg for all the White House aficionados up in here. Krista kept it safe and stuck with the colorfully festive patterns. We think she was scared of Martha, who coincidentally was twittering Krista all day Sunday while she was baking our Easter ham!

Major J'Adores to Zoe and Krista for pulling off an incredible Easter luncheon by the way. Photo of the eggceptional table below. J'Adore!

J'ADORE EQUINE DRAG!

2009-04-08T10:28:00.002-04:00

We are J'Adoring all over ourselves this morning because we just came across an article in the Daily Mail about photographer Julian Wolkenstein's photos of horses in drag. OMG! You have to click the link for more hilarity.

J'ADORE AWKWARD BONERS!

2009-04-08T09:36:00.004-04:00

We have a married friend who can't seem to get his mind off of our package. Whenever we see him he has to make some kind of reference to our mighty python. It's quite endearing, but if it continues, we might have to sit his wife down for a quick heart to heart, or in her husband's case, a hard to hard.

The other day, that friend sent us this site called Awkward Boners which features user submitted photos of men in various states of inopportune excitement. It's quite humorous, and one could say that we totally got a boner over it. J'Adore!

J'ADORE MR. MICKEY!

2009-04-06T09:16:00.002-04:00

We J'adore Paper Magazine's Mr. Mickey MAJOR! That goes without saying. But this morning, MM gave us even more reason to J'Adore him because he posted a major sucker punch to famed American designer Oscar De La Renta for repeatedly dissing Michelle Obama for repeatedly dissing HIM! J'Adore! It just doesn't get any better than this. Read the posting here.

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-04-06T08:34:00.004-04:00

PETA is not your friend, nor is it a friend to the animals. You must read this article to find out why.

J'ADORE COSTA RICAN BEACH HUTS!

2009-04-04T16:34:00.006-04:00

So we're totally going to Costa Rica in June for our friend Claire's wedding. She has a house in some far off part of the jungle on the Osa Peninsula. Apparently, there's absolutely nothing there. No cell phone service. No internet. No electricity after dark. We've been instructed to bring a headlamp, bug repellent, Crocs and a bathing suit! WTF?

We love our friend Claire, but we really hate roughing it. We give camping or anything of the sort a big JE N'ADORE PAS! But what we're NOT giving a big je n'adore pas to is the above pictured little beach house which we found for rent. It's nothing too fancy. It has a hammock. It has a mosquito net, and it's only about 15 steps to our own private beach.

Apparently, every afternoon, a big group of surfers meets up at our beach bench to go surfing. J'Adore surfers on our bench and beyond! Can. Not. Wait!

J'ADORE EXPONENTIAL GROWTH!

2009-04-01T19:01:00.000-04:00

J'ADORE OUR PEOPLE MAKING WINE!

2009-03-29T17:38:00.004-04:00

Okay, Bitches. You all know we're Lebanese, and we are one of the first J'Adorable peoples on this earth to blow it up MAJOR.

Our ancestors, The Phoenicians, were the first sea-faring merchants who supplied shit to everyone, and we mean EVERYONE. We gave the Egyptians the cedar wood used in helping to construct the pyramids. Lebanon was the epicenter of the Roman school of law, and we were the first people to export wine to foreign lands! Yes. You heard us right. It was us that made wine first! You don't think Jesus was drinking an Italian Valpolicella, do you?!?!

So it wasn't any surprise when we saw this article in the Wall Street Journal about the Lebanese wine industry and how it's finally getting the respect it deserves. Read it and learn, or we'll find you and CUT YOU like Bon Qui Qui.

J'ADORE!

J'ADORE BON QUI QUI!

2009-03-23T09:52:00.003-04:00

J'ADORE J'ADORING YOU ONCE AGAIN!

2009-03-23T08:16:00.003-04:00

Greetings, oh J'Adorable ones!!! We are back from our most incredible vacation, and we are SO tan that we make Samuel L. Jackson look like an albino!

Unfortunately, none of you guessed correctly the location of our tropical excursion which took place on the Mexican Riviera in one of the quaintest and most beautiful places on earth....Tulum, Mexico.

We had the most incredible time sunning our supple young bodies on the sand and floating in turquoise waters warm enough to soft boil an egg. Umm, okay. We don't understand that comparison either, but just go with it.

We're glad to be back, and we have some incredible J'Adorations coming your way, so sit back and wait for them. We're just too tan to J'Adore you right now...

J'ADORE MYSTERY VACATION SPOTS!

2009-03-15T18:54:00.005-04:00

We're off in the morning to a tropical locale somewhere in the Northern Hemisphere. Can you guess where we're going from the above photo? Email us with your guess, and if you're right, we'll send you a personalized J'Adoration upon our return! J'Adore!

J'ADORE KNOWING NOTHING!

2009-03-14T14:12:00.002-04:00

J'ADORE SAFARI 4!

2009-03-12T14:12:00.005-04:00

When it comes to internet browsing, we J'Adore Safari MAJOR! Firefox can go suck it! So when we heard yesterday from one of most in-the-know tech goddesses, Krista Freibaum, that Safari had a new beta version available for download, we let out a loud squeal in J'adoration! It was a bit embarrassing, even for our standards.

There are so many new features, all of which we are not going to delve into at the moment, but we do want to tell you about the most J'Adorable part of the new browser. It's called Top Sites.

The damn thing scans your history and figures out which sites you visit most often and it arranges them for you in a grid as pictured above. When one of your sites is updated, a little star appears. If you don't want to lose a site from the grid, you click on a push pin. It's insane! When you want to view your internet history, all the pages appear in Cover Flow just like they do in our iTunes! Who the hell comes up with this stuff?

Download your version of Safari 4 by clicking here.

J'ADORE ALEXANDER McQUEEN!

2009-03-12T13:13:00.003-04:00

This is exactly why we love the fashion industry. In a sea of bland designers who only churn out fashions for the sake of consumerism, every now and then, one of them comes along and just J'Adores you right out of the water! That designer, season and season again, has been Mr. Alexander McQueen.

For his Fall Winter 2009 Pret-a-Porter collection, McQueen explored the concept of re-invention. He showed his own take on Dior's New Look of '47 and Chanel's tweed jacket. He pulled from his own past collections, tweaked them and sent them back out. The set was a large pile of trash, pieces from his old sets. The runway was comprised of shattered glass. Hubcaps, empty aluminum cans, umbrella and lampshades all adorned the models in the form of "accessories"....hats, hair adornments, etc.

THIS is the reason we yearned to be part of the fashion industry when we were just wee little J'Adorable fetuses! The over the top extravagance of a fashion show. The fantasy world born from within the mind of an artist. The big FUCK YOUs to an industry in the form of "look what I can do". J'Adore!!!

View the full collection at Style.com.

J'ADORE SHARK FIN SOUP!

2009-03-12T03:32:00.001-04:00

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-03-12T01:43:00.007-04:00

We are not J'Adoring in the least at the moment because earlier this evening we received word that our beloved New York Post real estate columnist, Braden Keil, passed on late last night after a long battle with melanoma. We really cannot tell you how incredibly saddened we are by this news.

When we first started in the world of public relations over 7 years ago and we were fumbling our way through unchartered territory, Braden was always there for us letting us know that we would get through it. He was the first reporter that really believed in us when we couldn't have the courage to believe in ourselves.

We worked with some of New York City's most celebrated chefs at the time, and Braden was covering the culinary world for the NY Post on the side, even though real estate was his mainstay. He came to every dinner we hosted at our restaurants, and he wrote about every single one in the paper the next day. He loved to eat gourmet meals. He loved to drink the fine wines we offered. He also always laughed at our mundane stories which at times weren't very funny, but rather, just drunken.

We hadn't seen Braden in a couple of years, but we'll definitely miss him. His unconditional support and constant encouragement are part of the reason why we are where we are today.

We'll miss you, Braden. May you rest in peace. J'adore.

J'ADORE HAROLD & MAUDE!

2009-03-10T03:19:00.004-04:00

J'ADORE SANTINO!

2009-03-10T01:55:00.003-04:00

We want you to meet Santino The Chimp. This little guy is changing the way we view ourselves as human beings. Apparently, the 31-year-old Alpha male at Furuvik zoo in Sweden has gone about a little activity that many scientists are arguing is unique to humans only.

Every morning, before the zoo would open, Santino would gather stones and prepare them in piles, and later in the day, when visitors to the zoo would annoy the hell out of him, he would unleash a hailstorm of stones at them. This "planning for the future" as researchers call it has surprised the scientific world, proving that animals do indeed make plans ahead of time.

You know what? If we were locked up in a fenced in area only to wake to find snotty nosed kids and their fanny pack wearing parents staring, pointing and gawking us, we'd eventually figure out that the best way to deal with a crappy situation is to have some fun and start trying to hit the bitches with a rock.

We feel bad for Santino. They say that he rarely hits anyone due to his poor aim. We might have to fly our asses over to Sweden and help teach Santino how to aim and shoot a bitch down.

J'ADORE NINA RICCI SHOES!

2009-03-06T13:22:00.004-05:00

Olivier Theyskens TURNED IT OUT yesterday with his tour de force presentation for Nina Ricci during Paris fashion week. All the shoes were platform and without heels! J'ADORE!!!! Check out the full collection on Style.com.

J'ADORE Y-3 SPRING SUMMER!

2009-03-02T12:36:00.007-05:00

You know how we feel about Y-3. We J'Adore it like no other because there's no other to J'adore. Was that a bit existential? We're not sure, but what we ARE sure about is this video by Lloyd & Co. featuring the Spring Summer 2009 collection. Check it out and keep an eye out for us in all of these looks in the upcoming months.

J'ADORE FOUX DA FA FA!

2009-03-01T02:24:00.001-05:00

J'ADORE WHAT SHE SAID!

2009-02-27T17:57:00.002-05:00

J'ADORE PUG VADER!

2009-02-17T10:36:00.000-05:00

J'ADORE FASHION WEAKNESS!

2009-02-13T13:25:00.004-05:00

J'Adorables! It's fashion week here in NYC, and we're a bit crazy. So if we don't J'Adore you as often as you'd like us to, please do forgive. We'll be back soon.

J'ADORE CHOLULA!

2009-02-09T18:38:00.002-05:00

Quel happy day it is!!! We just came back from the store, and for the first time in over 10 years, we found Cholula Hot Sauce there! We love us some Cholula. It's the only hot sauce we use out on the west coast, and we've never been able to find it on the east coast. More tasty than Tabasco, Cholula is made with garlic and spices that it has a richer and fuller flavor than just the straight spice of Tabasco. J'Adore!

J'ADORE BRAD FISHER FOR MAJOR MODELS!

2009-02-09T12:12:00.002-05:00

Fashion week starts this Friday the 13th. Yes, we know. It's totally befitting, and we're just as frightened as you are. But this season, there's a little glimmer in the dark and gloomy recesses of all that scary-to-wear. It's our totes J'Adorable Brad Fisher.

Major Models must have been J'Adoring as of late, because they tracked down the Fisherman and commissioned him to emblazon their F/W 2009 show package with his work as per Chic Report.

J'ADORE ARKITIP ISSUE #50!

2009-02-03T10:49:00.007-05:00

As of late, we've totally canceled all of our subscriptions because we're over your issues, but yesterday, the hot Lady J'Adore aka Claire Darrow, sent us a link to Arkitip's Issue #50 which features haute hotelier to the masses, André Balazs...on all fours...just the way we like him, but we digress.

This issue focuses on the creative side of André's work, his obsessions and his "attention to detail" as the magazine puts it. We'll leave it to you to decided what that means. So why are we telling you all this? Because! And this is too J'Adorable...

Along with each issue comes one of four limited edition illustrations commissioned from Andrew Holder, each one depicting a different Balazs property. (The new New York Standard pictured above.) J'Adore! There are only 1500 illustrations, and each one is signed.

The issue goes on sale February 9th. One magazine with one illustration will cost you $30, but you can order all four illustrations for only $85. You can pre-order them by visiting the Standard Hotel Shop.

J'ADORE FIRST KISSES!

2009-02-02T18:36:00.001-05:00

J'ADORE BEING ABHORRED!

2009-02-02T18:34:00.000-05:00

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-01-28T12:48:00.003-05:00

Our world has totally come to an end. This is the worst news to hit the press since the day Clay Aiken came out to People Magazine. Conde Nast has announced today that our favorite home magazine, Domino, is being shut down! Why? WHY??? Why couldn't they have taken Vogue instead??? We need credenzas NOT couture!!! Everyone take a moment of silence for this incredibly tragic moment in history.

J'ADORE UNNECESSARY CENSORSHIP!

2009-01-28T12:35:00.002-05:00

Thanks to Bonjour, Pee Wee!

J'ADORE SUPERHERO TRANNY CRIME FIGHTING!

2009-01-26T22:57:00.002-05:00

Our fellow Jorge Miguel groupie and J'Adorable friend, Gerald McCullouch, went out and got himself all tangled up in some tranny crime-fighting mess last week. He is such a Wonder Woman!

Bitch was on the train and some one tried to jack his computer, but Gerald fought back and won. Read the full story that made the gossip columns over the weekend by clicking here.

J'ADORE BUTT HOLE ROAD!

2009-01-26T09:55:00.003-05:00

We are J'Adoring all over ourselves this morning because our good friend and journalistic sleuth, Christopher Tennant, sent us this NY Times article which delves into all the gloriously ill-named towns, streets and regions of the United Kingdom. We would love to live in Crotch Crescent, Oxford, but unfortunately, we found a place more in our budget on Tumbledown Dick Road in Oxfordshire. What's a J'Adorable to do???

J'ADORE THE OBAMAS DOING WHAT???

2009-01-23T09:42:00.002-05:00

Our boy Adam Laukhuf over at Details sent us this amazing news clip this morning. Who knew the Obamas were SO hardcore! You gotta J'adore them.

J'ADORE B. HO!

2009-01-22T23:44:00.004-05:00

Do we have to remind you how much we love Mary Cherry from the ill-fated WB television series Popular? Well, we were having a moment just a moment ago (it's passed now), and we had to revisit one of our most favorite clips EVER...mmmmkay??? Watch as Mary Cherry meets her long lost twin sister B. Ho. J'Adore!

If you need more Mary Cherry, cuz you know you do, check out these compilations in Parts One, Two, Three and Four!

J'ADORE SELLING SHOVELS!

2009-01-22T19:36:00.002-05:00

A first grade girl handed in the drawing above for a homework assignment. After it was graded and the child brought it home, the child returned to school the next day with the following note:

Dear Ms. Davis,

I want to be very clear on my child’s illustration. It is NOT of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at Home Depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm. This photo is of me selling a shovel.

Mrs. Harrington

J'ADORE THE TIDDY BEAR!

2009-01-22T13:18:00.003-05:00

So, our J'Adorable friend Davey G. who sent us the Get It On video received the above Tiddy Bear commercial from his friend Stephen Keefe who coincidentally works with our favorite J'Adorable, Tim Tareco, who sent us this Hores posting the other day. We are SO confused right now. Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to J'Adore!

Anybears, we think this thing should be called the Titty Bear being that every woman using in the commercial is rubbing it all up and down her titties! WTF? They should make one that vibrates and called it The Vaggie Bear. Okay, that one was weak, but we're tired and we're late for a meeting, so just go with it.

J'ADORE AIR HOSES MAKING US SHRIEK!

2009-01-22T01:18:00.003-05:00

This has to be a joke because we can't imagine it any other way back in the 60s? 70s? When was this filmed? Either way, we have to thank Big Daddy for this little piece of vintage heaven. Let's all shriek together now, shall we?

J'ADORE HORES!

2009-01-21T11:42:00.003-05:00

You know we J'Adore Hores just as much as the next J'Adorable, but when our good friend and visual genius, Tim Tareco, sent this in to us, we J'Adored all over our equine selves. When we were kids, we would ride hores for hours upon end, while our parents watched. We know. Sounds a bit kinky, but we were kids, and it was okay then. Anyhores, this letter from some random slutty 3rd grader is one for the books. J'Adore Hores!

J'ADORE 650 MILLION YEARS IN 1 MIN : 20 SEC!

2009-01-20T18:31:00.003-05:00

J'ADORE YES PECAN!

2009-01-20T16:35:00.002-05:00

Yes, Pecan! Yes, Pecan! Yes, Pecan!!! With today's historic inauguration, we bring to you Ben & Jerry's Yes, Pecan Ice Cream! During the month of January, if you get a scoop of Yes, Pecan ice cream at any Ben & Jerry's, they'll donate all proceeds to the Common Cause Education Fund. J'Adore!

J'ADORE WINGSUIT BASE JUMPING!

2009-01-15T21:32:00.002-05:00

OH! OUR! J'ADORABLE! GOD! Our good friend, Mary Pat, sent us this video today, and we want to wingsuit base jump! Like RIGHT NOW!!! We have always wanted to fly, and we're so gonna do it! Can you even imagine? When we do it though, we're gonna have our iPod on and blasting A Whole New World....in Japanese.

J'ADORE GETTING IT ON!

2009-01-15T21:24:00.002-05:00

Our boy Davey G. sent over this video today with no message attached. Was it an invitation? Was it a declaration? Or was it just mental masturbation? Because it came from Davey G., we're just gonna label it J'Adoration. Get! It! On!

J'ADORE MYSTERIOUS COLUMNS OF LIGHT!

2009-01-15T11:58:00.003-05:00

Click here for story and more photos.

UMMM, J'ADORE?

2009-01-14T14:59:00.002-05:00

At first this video was cute, then the damn little bitch pulled a porn star move and totally deep throated the carrot without even a chew!!! WTF? Total hamster slut! (Call us, little guy!)

J'ADORE FREAKY ANIMAL LOVE!

2009-01-14T12:16:00.000-05:00

J'ADORE LA LUNCHING!

2009-01-14T12:00:00.005-05:00

You already know how much we love our boozy lunches in LA with our good friends Darryl and Simone. Well, we had another one, except this time, it wasn't so boozy. We're not currently drinking, it was cold out, Darryl had to work, Simone was giving you J'Adorosity at its finest, so we all had tea. How J'Adorably civilized, n'est-ce pas?

This time around though, we had a special surprise guest, one whom you have grown to know J'Adore....Brad Fisher. We know! Can you believe it? He followed us out to LA too! Can't seem to shake him, but he's cool, so we keep him around. You never know when he'll ask us to sit for him to paint a nude portrait of us. Actually, it would have to be more of a mural, if you know what we mean... J'Adore!

All three J'Adorables are pictured above giving you their best Parking Lot Chic...

J'ADORE WTF?

2009-01-14T10:28:00.003-05:00

This photo gives us anxiety on so many levels! OMG! First, we don't know if we could handle being underwater like that. Second, we would probably faint and float away in the current if all of a sudden a big black whale strolls up out of nowhere. Don't get us wrong! It wouldn't be cuz the whale was black. It's cuz he's a whale that could gobble us up like an amuse-bouche! We can't look at it anymore! Je N'Adore Pas!

J'ADORE THE DORITOCIST!

2009-01-14T09:55:00.004-05:00

Remember when we told you about our friend Nic Chatfield and this Superbowl Dorito commercial? Well, the bitch went and made it to the final top 5 out of over 1900 entries! We know!!! J'Adorosity, right?

We need your help in getting him to win. So click here, and vote for Power of the Crunch. You have to register which we all hate, but the upside to it is that you can vote everyday and everyday you'll be entered to win a pair of tickets to the Superbowl which are valued at $10,000. Seems worth it to us, no?

J'ADORE PUBLICITY STUNTS!

2009-01-14T09:50:00.002-05:00

The Australian Board of Tourism has totally got us all in state of twittered J'Adoration. They are offering up The Greatest Job In The World which entails living on Hamilton Island on the Great Barrier Reef in Queensland. You get paid $100, 000 USD, and all you have to do is lay out, snorkel, play with the sand, J'Adore yourself a few times a day and blog about it for the world to see. WTF? This is the perfect job for us. We're gonna do it.

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2009-01-14T09:47:00.002-05:00

We don't like to get too politically j'adorable over here at the J'Adore Joey compound, but with what is going on in Israel, we feel we have to bring it up for just a nano-second. Actually, we're not even going to say anything because it upsets us so much, but we're going to ask that you read this.

J'ADORE WILD & CRAZY FRIDAY NIGHTS!

2009-01-10T12:12:00.003-05:00

We are so crazy right now. We really know how to party! Last night was out of control, and we're totally hungover from it all.

What did we do you ask? We stayed at home, drank chamomile tea and shopped online for a vacuum cleaner! Don't get all jealous! You don't even know how to party like we do, so don't even try it!

We ended up purchasing this little Pronto 2-in-1 deal by Electrolux. We can't wait to suck up those morbid little dust bunnies which have been lingering in the corners of our humble estate. Suck it!

J'ADORE GETTING YOU OFF OF OUR BACKS!

2009-01-10T12:07:00.003-05:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR, BITCHES!!! We know. We know. We haven't been J'Adoring, and you all have been reminding us on the daily! Who knew you would go through such withdrawls without a little J'Adoration? Thank you for your emails, now get off our backs cuz we're back!

J'ADORE HOME FOR THE HOLIDAYS!

2008-12-22T04:05:00.003-05:00

Okay, Bitches. We're off bright and early to the city of angels. Sometimes it feels like it's the city of HELL'S angels, but our friends and family are out there, so we have to go. We're wishing you a J'Adorey Christmas and Happy J'Adore Year!

We're sure we'll be posting randomly while out there, but if we don't, you'll understand, won't you? J'Adore!

J'ADORE FAREWELLING!

2008-12-22T03:58:00.002-05:00

You know those moods that you get into when you are just depressed, and to add to the depression you already feel, you put on a WAY depressing song that makes you just want to slash your wrists and cry your way to death? You don't? Well, uhhh, neither do we, then.

We randomly came across this song called Farewell by Rosie Thomas, and we J'Adored major! We're not depressed now, but when do go there, we know exactly which song to run to.

J'ADORE A GOLDEN CHRISTMAS!

2008-12-19T08:35:00.004-05:00

There is only one way to celebrate Christmas, and we think you already know what it is...

J'ADORE SMELLING YO DICK!

2008-12-19T07:40:00.002-05:00

We first heard this song a year or so ago, and we J'Adored, but today, we're having a little bit of a renaissance, on peut dire. Smelling dick is too J'Adorable.

J'ADORE COMING CLOSER!

2008-12-19T07:35:00.002-05:00

JE N'ADORE PAS!

2008-12-18T01:20:00.002-05:00

Right now we're giving the world a BIG Je N'Adore Pas! We don't know what's going on as of late, but we just feel like we're being constantly lied to. Co-workers, family, friends. The list goes on...

What bothers us most is when our friends lie to us. We don't understand why they do it. Do they thinking we would judge them? Do they just not want us to know the truth? Do they just want to keep their truths away from the world? Don't they know the world exposes their truths whether they like it or not? We don't know, and we try not to care, but when you're lied to, it just makes you wonder...

Okay, enough! We're giving OURSELVES a big Je N'Adore Pas right about now! We just had to vent cuz we have had enough...

J'ADORE GIVING THIS FAT FUCK A CARROT!

2008-12-16T14:28:00.006-05:00

We are J'Adoring all over ourselves this afternoon over the most genius blog we've come across in a very long time, aptly entitled Fuck You, Penguin! Photos of the cutest animals on the planet are posted, and then they're totally told off for being so fucking cute! J'Adorosity at its finest!

J'ADORE TURNING BACK TIME! HOOO OHOHOH!

2008-12-14T10:37:00.001-05:00

J'ADORE HOMOMENTS!

2008-12-11T14:19:00.005-05:00

We totally just had a homoment at the office and get up on chair and did a little dance, Mein Herr! Fosse! Fosse! Fosse!