We know. You hate us, and it's too late to apologize. It's too late. But we have a day job, bitches! It keeps us from you, and if we could just get rid of it so we could j'adore you all night long on a sheared mink rug by a crackling fire, we would! We swear we would, but we can't.
Anyj'adore, one of the reasons we've been gone is Donna Karan. We organized her surprise 60th birthday party a couple of weeks back at The Box, and it was WAY too much fun! Everyone came from Billy Joel to Lorraine Bracco to Iman to yogi Rodney Yee and power gays including Calvin Klein, Sandy Gallin and Ross Bleckner.
We had planned for a crazy lineup of entertainment, one part including a big fake cake from which Ashton Kutcher was to jump out of. Well, when Ashton told us he wouldn't be able to make it, we were a bit saddened, but when we got to The Box the night of the party, we were incredibly relieved because the cake had a typo! Whoever made the cake spelled it Donna KAREN! WTF? Who does that? The mistake was too j'adorable so we took a photo right before we had it dumped in the trash. J'Adore!
We're hoping to stay with you for a while, but we have two ultra fabulous parties we're doing in Houston, Texas for a powerhouse Italian fashion brand, the name of which we are contractually bound not to give out. We'll fill you in after the fact. Maybe we'll even give you a little update from on site down south, but we can't promise anything cuz we'll probably be too busy killing and grilling our own dinner. You know how they do in Texas!