J'ADORE HOUSE OF LAVANDE!

So, we had the TIME OF OUR LIVES this past Wednesday when our good friends Karen Elson (left) and Sarah Sophie Flicker, both of the The Citizen's Band, hosted an incredibly chic dinner for us in honor of House of Lavande, the ONLY place to go for your vintage couture and costume jewelry!

We blew up the dinner MAJOR!  It was the talk of the week. Everyone was there.  You can check it out at The Daily or Style.com or Vogue or Paper Magazine or...  Just kidding.  We think you get the picture.

So, now you understand why we've been a little distant, but you know we J'Adore you always!

J'ADORE MAKING MOVIES!

Check out the movie we made today, Bitches!  We just learned how to use iMovie, and yes, we know, it's a little bit simple, but it's only our FIRST ONE!  There are so many more to come!  We can't wait!  This one was shot on location in Aguadilla, Puerto Rico!  We are such international movie makers!!!

J'ADORE CHINESE EYE TESTS!

We don't want to hear it.  We know it's racist, but it's fucking funny! This is a Chinese eye test. If you can't decipher what the above says, grab the corners of your eyes and pull them outward like you did when you were a kid pretending to be Asian.  It really works, and we J'Adore the nonsense of it all! Thanks to Hilary from Palm Springs for sending it in!

J'ADORE WHAT!

WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?

J'ADORE JAPAN IS THE WORLD!

OH. OUR. J'ADORABLE. GOD!!! You bitches know how much we J'Adore this song, and the Japanese have just raped, molested, electrified, J'Adorified, synthesized and whatever else-ified this song! We're not sure we understand what just happened here. We're gonna go wash our eyes out with some fresh wasabi! Thanks to Mary Pat for sending it in!

J'ADORE HAVING NOTHING TO SAY!

J'ADORE HITLER FOR GAP JEANS!

J'ADORE INSPIRATION!

If we ever had to give an interior designer one inspiration photo upon which to base the design of our room, house, castle, this would be it.  We J'Adore color MAJOR!

J'ADORE CONFRONTATION PART DEUX!

J'ADORE CONFRONTATION!

J'ADORE FATIGUE!

J'ADORE FEDEX!

This is why we J'Adore Fedex!

J'ADORE BEING POLITE!

There are days when we just don't have the patience.  We have worked way too long and way to hard to have people tell us what to do, what to say, how to be and when to be it.  So to all those people, we say "Be Polite."

J'ADORE THE QUOTE OF THE DAY!

"Your lack of organization does not constitute an emergency on our behalf." - Unknown

We first came across this quote back in 1994.  It was on a plaque behind a legal clerk in the Van Nuys, CA courthouse.  Don't ask us why we were there.  That's a story for a whole other blog which should be entitled Je N'Adore Pas Joey, but we digress...

Today, we're dedicating this quote to all the fashion publicists of New York...specifically, the ones located in Soho on lower Broadway who think their jobs are about glamour and lunches and socializing when they really should be paying attention to the needs of their clients.  It's time to take off the CHANEL sunglasses, Ladies, and start focusing on the communications in your inbox!

J'ADORE DICK!

Look what our best friend in Los Angeles just bought us! A framed Dick! J'Adore! It reminds us of Ed Ruscha's early work. Where do you think we should hang it? Maybe from our belt buckle?

JE N'ADORE PAS!

The Duggar Family scares us. They have 17 children, and they've just announced that number 18 is on the way! All the kids names start with J (which we actually J'Adore for the obvious reasons). They have a deli in their house. They share all their clothes. They read the Bible during dinner. They live in Arkansas. The dad's name is JIM BOB!!!!

We don't want to be mean, but we don't think this is very normal. Check out these photos for further fear factors.

J'ADORE RAUCHEN VERBOTEN!

What the hell is going on?  We're sitting here working 16 hours days every day while all of our friends are cruising the world having the time of their lives.  First it was Claire and Emilia at the Chanel show, and now we just got this pic in an email from another one of our most J'Adored closet cases, Neil Rasmus, who's in Vienna for The Lifeball.

We heard not too long ago that Mini Cooper was presenting its new Clubman designed by Agent Provacateur, and lo and behold, Neil sends us a photo of himself flanked by the Mini models in Vienna at the Clubman presentation. Whatever he wants to do to justify his existence is fine with us....as long as he calls us in the morning!  J'Adore!

And by the way, Rauchen Verboten means No Smoking!  J'Adore Rauchen!

J'ADORE CHANEL CRUISING!

We don't have to tell you about our most J'Adored bitches, Claire Darrow and Emilia Menocal, cuz you already know.  They sent us this picture from this season's Chanel Cruise Show down in Miami which took place at The Raleigh Hotel this past week!  You remember we produced the last Chanel Cruise show in LA.  How could you forget that one with the private jets???

We didn't get to work on this Chanel show though.  Don't ask. Karl and us had it out a few months back.  We don't want to get into the details of it all, but let's just say it involved a piece of sashimi, a fan and us knocking those damn glasses off his face with the back of our hand!  J'Adore!

Anyj'adore....we're glad Claire and Emilia had a good time. We just hope that they deflated that damn beach ball and brought it back to us as a peace offering because we're mad at them too!!! We heard through the grapevine that they hung out with Stan D'Arde a couple of weeks back and played guitar hero with him! Why didn't they invite us???  He's our GOD!

JE N'ADORE PAS!!!

OH OUR GOD!!!  We know you hate us!  We've been gone for so long!  The emails from you guys have FLOODED our inbox!  Your cries for J'Adoration!  Your pleas for posts!  Hilary in Palm Springs SCREAMED at us!  Ian in Connecticut THREATENED us with mortality.  Renco in Iowa politely asked if we were still alive.  WE ARE SO SORRY!  We've been burning the candle at both ends over the past few weeks, and none of that molten wax has landed on our nipples....unfortunately.

To give you an idea of our schedule.... we were in LA for two weeks producing the Shinjo Ito exhibition and dinner.  Then we flew back to begin work on a dinner in two weeks for House of Lavande.  And while we were doing that, we got a call to do a fancy pants dinner party in June for Bulgari.  AND on top of that, we got another call to produce a three day party weekend situation in July in Sagaponack, NY!

CALGON TAKE US AWAY!!!

You know we J'Adore you!