J'ADORE THE WORST BLOOPER EVER!

J'ADORE FINALLY UNDERSTANDING WHY WE DRINK!

Late last night, we received this most interesting of videos from Current TV. It explains why we drink, and clearly, we wanted to know.  We thought we drank because we were nourishing our livers, but according to this video, we are wrong.

First watching it, we were confused.  They were talking about puppies and saccharine and raw potatoes and baring our butts in public? What?  We also would have preferred for the video to be narrated by someone who can actually pronounce the word maintenance, but we digress...

When they FINALLY go to the point and explained why we drink, it hit us like a brick!  It's so true!  How could we not have realized this before???  Except they got one thing wrong!  Our ACTUAL career path is HIGHER than our INTENDED career path, and THAT'S why WE drink!  That, and the fact that our hamster died in our arms when we were 3 years old!  J'Adore!

J'ADORE OUR FAVORITE DRUG!

Morris is like our most favorite drug EVAH!  It's like he's a demon we can't face down. We know we let him have all the power. We can't help it. He's like a leech, sucking the life out of us! We're addicted. We're never gonna quit him over time! We need to go to puppy rehab! He's taking over our lives, and we can't stand it anymore! Somebody...please help!

J'ADORE BEING FILTHY RICH!

We are so proud of our little closet case, Christopher Tennant, because the bitch went out and wrote himself a book!  Yes, a whole book!  One day, we woke up and there it was.  A book!  We know! We know!  We can't believe it either, but it's true...

You know what else?  It's not just a book....it's a book about the filthiest of the filthiest rich people in the world!  It's so J'Adorable, we can't really contain ourselves.  It's called The Official Filthy Rich Handbook and is available for purchase here.  Make sure to check the search inside feature. 

J'ADORE A LITTLE NEW YORK FLAVOR!

It still boggles our minds how stupid people can be.  A story from The Telegraph ran today about 200 stupid people who called in to complain about a new Heinz Mayo ad (see below) running in the UK which depicts two men kissing.  Heinz has subsequently pulled the ad due to the complaints of these 200 douche bags.

Where do we start???  

First of all, it's not about the two men kissing.  It's about the embodiment of the "mother" via the typical New York Deli man. It's clearly a symbolic representation of the mayonnaise and not of the mother, per se.

Secondly, according to the complaints, the commercial is inappropriate for children, and it forces parents to explain same sex partnerships.  What the hell is there to explain???  Same sex partnerships are a way of life.  They always have been.  The only hinderance here is the closed minds of the parents and not the ad.

Lastly, shame on Heinz for pulling the ad over 200 complaints.  If you're going to have the balls to shoot and air this incredibly humorous commercial, have the balls to stand behind it.

We're a little saddened by the sheer lack of audaciousness. Honestly, why boldly move forward only to hold ourselves back?

We're too tired to really get into the frivolity of it all.  Email us and let us know what you think.

J'ADORE CENSOR BAR ART!

We're not sure what to make of this kind of art, but it's original and it's interesting and we're J'Adoring it.  You have to click here to see what we're talking about!

Thanks to our favorite closet case, Ian from Connecticut, for sending it in.

J'ADORE MICHAEL K!

We think our boy, Michael K, over at DListed! is totally in love with us.  First, we won the Caption This Contest a little while back, and now he posted another photo we sent in as his Caption This for June 24th!

You all have to submit captions....and let us know if you win!!!

J'ADORE PIERREZ HILTON!

My friends were sitting for a casual little dinner on a quaint little side street in Paris last week, when all of a sudden a crazy block party started forming all around them out of nowhere!  We J'Adore when that happens.  

But what we're really J'Adoring is the above video they sent us of the French version of Perez Hilton dancing the night away.  We like to refer to him as Pierrez Hilton, bien sur!!!

J'ADORE HUDSON DREW!

We all want you to meet our latest fascination, Drew, the bartender at Hudson Blue, the bar at the Fuddrucker's in the ferry terminal down the street from our house.  We like to call him Hudson Drew!  Get it?  Drew rhymes with blue?  Whatever.  If we have to explain it...

Not only is he the sweetest thing on the planet (he remembered to call us by our first name every time he addressed us!), he also looks GREAT in a skimpy speedo ...well, not that we would know, but we were trying to imagine it while we sipped on our Stella Artois!  J'Adore!

He's a good kid overall, and we know what days of the week he works, so if you want to meet us there, email us, and we'll make sure that you get nowhere near him!

J'ADORE FELIZ NAVI-BLAH!

OH.  OUR.  J'ADORE!  We can't stop laughing.  Our friend Big Daddy over at Bonjour, PeeWee posted the above soundboard of PeeWee clips, and we can't stop listening to #3!  Double click on it to hear the J'Adorosity of it all!  Feliz Nav-BLAH!

Oh, and by the way, Big Daddy named his blog Bonjour, PeeWee after one crazy drunken night when he was trying to watch PeeWee on DVD but couldn't get switch back from the French dubbing to English!  J'Adore!  That's J'Adoralicious in its own right!

J'ADORE THE GOOD NEWS!

We've been waiting to tell you this for a while now, but we couldn't really wait any longer.  And now, the above story was on the news today, so I guess it's out!  We really hope for your support!  J'Adore!

J'ADORE THE NOTORIOUS I.R.A.Q.I. !

Our boys over at Radar posted the above video made by our troops over in Iraq.  It's pretty genius editing, but aren't they supposed to be spreading democracy or something like that over there? Hmmmm.

JE N'ADORE PAS!

Oh, J'Adorables!  The past week has been uber-crazy for us, and we totally have felt the goldfish above.  First, we totally threw out our back at a J'Adorably over the top family function.  We were holed up all weekend on our backs (clearly not for any good reason), and we missed a weekend in The Catskills with our friends Michael and Peter.  Then we finally felt a little better and we went to a dinner on Sunday then an Indian dinner in Queens on Monday then we did a pub quiz on Tuesday (we found $100 on the street!) then we stayed in on Wednesday and here we are today trying to catch up with our J'Adorably out of control lives!  Phew!  That was a mouthful!  

So we're back, but we don't know for how long.  We'll see what the future holds!

J'ADORE THE CHICKEN LADY!

This shit is HYSTERICAL!  We forgot how much we loved the Chicken Lady!  If you don't watch the whole thing, fast forward to 3:10 for when Rooster Boy comes over!  We totally fell out of our chair laughing!

J'ADORE DRINKING AND NOT DRIVING!

J'ADORE ALL THE FUSS OVER A FEW EXTRA S's!

J'ADORE INVADING CANADA!

You might remember our friend, Aaron Newbill?  Yeah.  We don't blame you if you don't.  Sometimes, we don't even remember until his name pops up on our caller ID like it did just a few minutes ago.  

He was calling to let us know that he's in Toronto filming a show for Ford's Supermodel of the World.  He's like the Paula Abdul of modeling competition judges....all boozed up, saying shit nobody really understands.  (We'd say he's the Tyra Banks of modeling competitions, but Aaron is a big ol' black girl on the inside, and we don't want to perpetuate that notion.)

ANYJ'ADORE... he called to give us an update on how the camera crew has been following him around, how they offered him clothes to wear by Diesel, the show sponsor, and how he brutally rebuffed their offers stating that he only wears Martin Margiela! JEEZ!  Give a bitch a camera and some attention, and she turns all Mariah Carey divalicious on your ass!

We told him to pick the ugliest girl and have her win, but knowing Aaron, he'll just award himself the title of Supermodel of the World.  We'll let you know how it all turns out!

JE N'ADORE PAS!

Our hair guy totally BUTCHERED our gorgeously J'Adorable mane last night, and now (and we don't mean to be mean), but we look like Chris Burke who played Corky on Life Goes On!  We're horribly upset.  Actually, come to think of it, Corky looks better than us!!!  Je N'Adore Pas!

J'ADORE THE QUOTE OF THE DAY!

"Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it." 

- Buddha

J'ADORE ONE PACK OF SAND!

We are sooooo proud of our girl Elettra!  She hit up Letterman last night looking amazing as usual.  Her genius regarding kindergarten math is epic!  

She and us are working on a very special project together, and we'll be back with you shortly about it.  It's amazing, and we're gonna need all of your help for it!  J'Adore!!!

J'ADORE WALKING WITH YOU!

We can't stop making movies!  We need help!  Does a movie making rehab even exist?  Anyway, these are some of our peeps with who we were walking last week.  Jennifer Missoni, Zuleikha Robinson, Kate Schelter and David Gruning!  We totally want to walk with them again soon.

Thanks to Big Daddy over at BPW for providing Frankie Knuckles' remix of Rock with You.

J'ADORE HOOKING ZAIYA!

We love us some iMovie major!  We want to make movies all day long!  Except we're not that great with it yet, so Spielberg will just have to wait.  The above clip is our friend Zaiya Latt who you'll remember from the clambake.  Who could forget the clambake???  

Anyway, he totally got himself hooked on a massive lure with an extremely sharp barb.  Unfortunately for him, he's probably the only thing he'll catch on that lure.  He DID graduate dumb school with honors after all!

J'ADORE REUNIONS!

The two guys in this video raised this lion cub at home.  When the cub outgrew their home, they decided to send him to Africa to live in the wild.  After a year or so, the two men wanted to go back and see him.  Their handlers told them that he probably wouldn't remember them.  Watch video to see what happens.

J'ADORE GETTING SEARCHED!

Thanks to Renco for sending in.

J'ADORE THE QUOTE OF THE DAY!

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk.  That will teach you to keep your mouth shut!" - Ernest Hemingway

J'ADORE EVERYBODY FINDING OUT!

We totally forgot how funny this episode was!

J'ADORE CRACK!

In light of today's titilating Tatum News, we have received the most interesting of web pages from our good friend Mary Pat! She's like our crack dealer as of late, supplying us with the most J'Adorably addictive content around!

Anyj'adore...the site in question is this.  A general round up of all things crack and/or crack related!  

Our favorites are Beam Me Up Scottie (crack dipped in PCP), Bill Blass (crack and/or one of America's greatest fashion designers), Chicken Scratch (searching on hands and knees for crack), Crack Attack (craving for crack), Kabuki (crack pipe made from a plastic rum bottle) and Bag Bride (crack smoking prostitute).

Stay off the crack, kids!

JE N'ADORE PAS!